Bookstart Dads

Introduction

Michelle Herriman is the Senior Librarian for Children and Young People in Milton Keynes and works in a job share capacity. She was part of the original Bookstart steering group in Milton Keynes and when Bookstart funding became available in 2000 co ordinated Bookstart: Books for Babies in Milton Keynes. She was also on the Sure Start steering group for the local programme in Milton Keynes and succeeded in acquiring funding for a librarian post to work on the programme. The recruitment process was unsuccessful and as a result Michelle took on extra hours to deliver this area of work.

Michelle is responsible for delivering two hugely popular Tuesday morning sessions in the library during term times which usually attract 100 babies and their carers to the 0-2s session and 50 children and their carers to a storytime for 2-5s. These sessions are doubled during the summer holidays to cope with increased demand.

In addition Michelle runs sessions targeted at attracting dads as follows:

• A Saturday session is held once a month which attracts 60 -70 parents and under 2s of which at least half are dads. These sessions also attract a large number of working mothers who attended the Tuesday morning sessions before returning to work.
• A Dads Zone at the Rowan Children’s Centre.
• A fortnightly session with a young parents group which have attracted big numbers including some dads.

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What were the reasons for setting up these sessions?

A large number of mothers and female carers attend weekly sessions at the library but there was a real need to explore ways to engage dads at a time when they were free to attend. Four years ago the Library Service decided (as part of Family Learning Week in October) to pilot some weekend sessions and these were advertised as ‘Don’t let Mums have all the Fun!’ The sessions proved so popular and successful that they have continued to run once a month. The following year funding was applied for from Adult Continuing Education to support family learning in the group and funds were used to buy cushions, puppets and musical instruments for the group. The delivery of these sessions supports the business objectives of the Library Service, of Family Learning and supports the delivery of the Every Child Matters five outcomes.

The Dads Zone group is aligned with the delivery of the Children’s Centre’s agenda of improving parent’s access and skills in promoting the development of their children. The session is delivered in partnership with Sure Start and now the Children’s centre community development workers. An initial attempt to run stand alone play session for dads was unsuccessful so the formula of a joint play/stories, songs and rhymetime session was formulated and was a great success with the dads. This is held once a month on a Saturday morning for two hours. A regular group of about fifteen dads attend although at its peak the group membership has been thirty dads and 40-50 children.

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What has been successful in terms of encouraging dads to attend the sessions?

• The approach of staff. It is critical when working with all parents to generate an environment where they are treated with respect, feel comfortable and gain enjoyment. Staff need to be trained to understand the importance of generating a welcoming, friendly and respectful atmosphere for dads in order to ensure they are motivated to keep attending. It is important that all staff are in tune with how things are done and how any situations are dealt with to inspire the confidence of parents. This is also supported by making the setting visually exciting, physically comfortable and where possible offer access to other play activities, such as water, sand or craft opportunities. As parents become more relaxed and get to know the staff as trusted people they will seek information and advice about a range of issues and are often signposted to other services and this broadens the impact of the service for children and families and promotes partnership working. Staff also need to be able to adapt their approach to the needs of the group members, for example, in the Sure Start sessions some dads can feel nervous that their children will misbehave and cause them embarrassment. The Sure Start staff are skilled at supporting dads in helping the children settle and they intervene early and sensitively to maintain children’s engagement. This provides reassurance for the dads and raises their confidence in attending the sessions. It also models and supports the dads in developing strategies for dealing with their children’s restlessness and turns a potentially negative experience into a positive one. Some of the children attending these sessions have real issues about settling and join in with the activities so this kind of support is critical to keep the dads and children engaged. It is not uncommon for some children to take up to eight weeks before they are able to sit down and engage with the session.
• Leading the sessions. The personality and style of the person leading the session is central to success. Parental feedback suggests that the dads like Michelle’s extrovert and engaging personality but also comment that she demonstrates a high degree of intuition and experience in knowing what participants need and enjoy( see annexe 1&2). It is therefore necessary to be flexible and adaptable, to be responsive to the group and to adapt session plans to provide activities that maximise enjoyment and engagement of the babies, children and dads. Above all the sessions must be fun for everyone and the leader must transmit the sense of fun and pleasure they are getting from taking part. It is also important that the leader can show that mistakes can be made or things can go wrong and everyone can laugh about it because this promotes a relaxed atmosphere and group cohesion.
• Motivating dads to remain engaged. It is important to develop a supportive and inclusive environment and to capitalise on the experience of dads who have been regular attendees. This encourages the dads who have been attending for some time to support newer members and to act as models if newer dads feel ill at ease. In some cases more experienced dads help lead the session or play musical instruments. Knowing which dads to approach first to join in activities is important as it helps break down the inhibitions of the more self conscious dads. The pleasure and enjoyment of the children and parents is a key factor in securing their commitment to attending on a regular basis. Dads need to enjoy the sessions but the fun they have with their children and progress they see their children making is even more powerful and few need convincing of the benefits of continuing to attend. It is important that the leader also recognises and celebrates the contribution children make and really engage them in the sessions, for example, in the baby groups the rising twos are encouraged to come and stand at the front and help lead on songs or rhymes they know well. Dads also tell other dads about how good the sessions are and encourage others to attend.
• Publicity. The sessions have been featured in the local press and are publicised in the library, on the website, the Family Information Service and through partnership contacts ( see annexe 3). In the children’s centre parents who do not normally use the service are often attracted by special events such as a Christmas event with Santa and a grotto where all the gifts were books. Other events such as ‘Meet the Tweenies’ and a ‘Thomas the Tank’ event provide an opportunity to make face to face contact with families who don’t attend regularly and this can be successful in promoting the benefits of stories, rhymes and songs for children and enable staff to personally inviting parents to try the sessions.

A CD has been produced in partnership with Sure Start which is sold to parents who attend the library sessions at low cost (or gifted to families using the Sure Start centre). This is a means of bringing the songs and rhymes from the sessions into the children’s homes and can be used as a learning tool at home or in the car. It has proved to be very popular with families and reinforces the learning and the fun of the sessions as well as increasing the likelihood that all family members, including dads, will become familiar with the materials and joining in at home.

Building on the success of the CD a DVD has been produced in partnership with Sure Start which illustrates how Stories, Songs and Rhymes can be put across to small children in a way that engages them. Michelle determined the content of the DVD and led the sessions recorded and one of the dads, who is a regular attendee at the monthly sessions, played the guitar on the DVD. The DVD will be widely promoted in all the groups and is used as a means of encouraging parents to carry on using the songs and rhymes from the sessions at home. The library is currently going out to harder to reach groups and running sessions based on the DVD and encouraging parents to take a copy of the DVD to use at home. It is anticipated that the DVD, which is very professionally produced, will be used over and over again at home and will act as a means consolidating the positive benefits of the sessions and of encouraging the harder to reach parents to watch the DVD and join in the songs and rhymes with their children at home. It is hoped that the DVD will encourage more parents to attend organised sessions as they will know what to expect and be familiar with the songs and rhymes that will be used.

• As part of the RAW campaign attendees were asked to bring a parent and child who had never previously attended to a baby song and rhymetime. This proved to be a successful way of attracting new members as some enjoyed the sessions so much that they continue to attend.

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Are the Dads regular library users?

The extent to which attendees become library members varies between different groups of groups of parents. Library membership, Bookstart and bookcrawl are promoted with all parents and individual parents are encouraged to join and use library services. Families who would not normally become library users are targeted, for example, by giving talks at parenting groups run by health visitors and outreach work with young single parents. The outreach work with young parents has been less successful in attracting dads to the library than mothers, so the library are committed to continuing to work with the dads in the group where they clearly feel more comfortable.

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What do you do in the sessions?

The sessions combine a mixture of traditional rhymes, stories and action songs. British sign language is used to aid communication before children can speak. Puppets are used to demonstrate the actions with many of the activities and each child is given a musical instrument such as bells or thunder eggs to shake in time to the rhyme of the rhymes and songs. Story sacks are used containing soft toys, books and other props and the parents and children are involved in taking things out of the sacks throughout the session. Sometimes it is important to slow down the pace so that the children who are just beginning to learn the actions are not behind, and as a result it is truly a child lead session. As children are reaching two they are usually really engaged and at this stage it is important to watch and listen out for them as they repeat what the leader is saying and anticipate what is about to happen. It makes them so confident and proud when their contribution and progress is acknowledged with a “Well done”.

The sessions are linked to the Every Child Matters outcomes, for example, during National Dental Care week the songs and rhymes focused on teeth and parents were given leaflets about dental hygiene.

Does the involvement of a male worker have any impact on dads attending?

Michelle is convinced that having the right staff with the right skills and approach is the key factor in attracting dads. Male staff members are involved in some sessions and this has been positive. When male staff members are not available regular attendees are used as role models and sometimes lead part of the session.

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Partnership working

There is a growing interest and motivation from colleagues in other departments and partners in increasing the involvement of dads in children’s services and the demand to support this cannot be met within existing resources. There are close links with Family Learning colleagues and this allows introduction of some parents to adult literacy classes as a result of attending the sessions. There is also close partnership working with health visitors, dental health, special needs and speech and language services. Michelle works closely with all statutory and voluntary Early Years colleagues including childminders. There are also links with local bookshops that fund events where groups are invited to special sessions in partnership with Bookstart.

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What are the key ingredients of success for your group?

The key ingredients of success are:

• Offering a product that is of high quality, making sure there is a positive atmosphere so that everyone has fun and want to come back next time,
• Having session leaders who are confident, skilled and sensitive to the needs of both dads and children in the groups,
• Creating an inclusive and respectful environment which breaks down any tendency for cliques to develop,
• Using a welcoming and visually attractive location and running sessions at times dads are able to attend.

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Future development

Michelle believes they have a winning formula in Milton Keynes and that there is enormous potential and demand to run more sessions in the library and to become engaged with a whole range of groups locally. Sadly, the resources available are limited and Michelle has to constantly prioritise in order to deploy resources where they are most effective. In reality this may sometimes mean that developing work with young single mothers has to be prioritised over developing more work with dads.

Annexe 1. - Feedback from dads who attend sessions in Milton Keynes

Storytime Rocks! Saturday is Daddy's day, what more can I say. We love all the songs and action and practise them all at home. Thank you.

Richard Pathmore

As a fulltime professional father, Daddy’s bounce and rhymetime allows me to spend quality educational time and helps my son develop as well. Shaylan enjoys the interaction with all the other children as much as I do.

Hitesh Chawda

Storytime is fantastic for Dads to get together with their kids.It's always great to feel part of something and the inclusive atmosphere is very welcoming. Chloe and I will certainly be repeat visitors. I've just one request - can we have them weekly?

Rob Parkes

Songs and Rhyme time gives me a chance to spend quality time with my son (Rhys) and also to have man chats with other dads. Oh and I also enjoy singing silly songs a bit more than I should!

Paul Goodwin

Storytime has given me a great base with my daughter in developing her key skills and she has slowly developed the routines over her first two years while we learnt the songs and moves together as she has grown. The atmosphere is great and my daughter gets excited at home when I tell her we are going.

Robert Matthews

The Baby Songs And Rhyme time sessions for dads at the library is great for me and Alex, my 15 month old. While I can get some quality fun with my son, my partner can have some well earned time on her own for an hour. I soon picked up on the songs and found them useful when I was trying to calm Alex at other times. There a good number of dads that go to the sessions and it's nice to see familiar faces. Michelle and Debbie are great with the kids and manage to involve both dad and child without patronising or embarrassing. We started going when Alex was 3 months old and have continued to go because we enjoy the time.

Daniel Shipley

Annexe 2.- Testimonials compiled by dads and sent to a Guardian journalist.

Jim Mallindine comments

SONGS AND RHYMES

WHAT IS IT?

It's a place for children to go (toddlers in my case) to sing some simple songs, learn some movements to these songs, and develop their co-ordination and communication in a safe environment. They meet Tuesdays and also run some Saturday sessions (for us Dads).

WHAT DID I THINK INITIALLY?

My initial reservations were cynical - it all sounded a bit "happy clapping" - people sitting around smiling vacantly and singing songs.

WHAT DO I THINK NOW?

I'm smitten by the sessions. They're fun, great for the toddlers, involving for the adults and the blasted songs stay with you when you leave. So I'm smitten. But so is my boy. My little boy's eyes light up when we go. He's so excited; he jumps and runs on the spot! He absolutely adores the sessions, and the women who run them (Michelle and Debbie), and I have to admit, it even brings a tear to my manly eye to watch him have so much fun. He simply comes alive when the singing starts, and just loves to be involved in the sessions, often calling out the words to them both before the song starts.

The sessions also give us a common bond as well - songs to sing at home, actions to repeat, and things to play. I take this away from every session, and love the bond this gives me and my boy. For me working all day means I get little enough time to see my child. When I see him so vibrant and sparkling with energy, I'm so proud. It's hard to know the right decisions to make when bringing up a child, but I do know that attending the "Song and Rhyme Time" sessions on Saturday is a "right one".

I've now got a little girl too, Lauren. I'll be making sure she goes. I wouldn't miss it for the world. Hope this is useful. It's all from the heart. You guys do a great job.

David Lovesey's comments.

Grace and I have been coming along to the sessions since she was six months old. She's now nineteen months, and we've missed about four or five sessions over that time. I am an avid reader, and I wanted Grace to enjoy coming to the library when she got older - neither my wife nor stepdaughter are keen readers but I want Grace to learn the joys of books!

When I first came to the sessions I was surprised that there were so many dads present - I'd tried joining the NCT just before Grace was born but the dad's group was pretty small and seemed very much about the social events rather than the fatherhood aspects! I assumed this was a typical story and there aren't so many active dads as mothers! How wrong I was...

There aren't many activities that dads can share with babies outside the home until they are about two / two and a half years of age. As a free activity the Bounce and Rhyme time sessions offer more interactivity with my baby than I can get at the entrance-fee based activity centres around Milton Keynes. The dads (and mums) there all seem to enjoy themselves and no-one really minds making fools of themselves with the dances!

Grace is pretty quiet at the sessions (in a minority group compared to the other kids there!) but she certainly pays attentions to the songs and stories - I don't need any more evidence than the fact that when we're at home having evening bath time and we sing the songs we learn at the session she knows almost all of the dance moves and happily performs them!

Why else do I go? All selfish reasons! Coming to sessions is a good excuse to visit the library and doing these activities with Grace makes me feel like a "proper" parent - it's far more positive than just parking her in front of the television so I can get on with other things! It is also the one activity (due to my wife's aversion to libraries and crowds!) that Grace and I share alone - everything else I usually play second fiddle to because Grace tends to favour her mother's company when we're at home!

I look forward to coming regularly, until she's able to read for herself and then that will be the next activity we will have together that's just for Grace and me.

Annexe 3 - Extract from Milton Keynes Library website

Songs and Rhymetime at MK Central Library

Fun for all the family at Songs and Rhymetime for 0-2s in the Children's Library at Milton Keynes Central Library.

27 Dads and 25 Mums with their babies came to the recent Song and Rhymetime to sing nursery rhymes with the children's library staff. The babies learnt signs and actions to accompany the rhymes and songs. The group's favourite songs were "Two little hands" and "What's in the bag?" and everyone enjoyed the story sack of Kipper's rainy day.

Why not come and join in the fun with your baby? Here are the next dates - we look forward to seeing you.

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